Sex in a Coffin (Kismet Knight, Vampire Psychologist) Read online

  Sex in a Coffin

  Lynda Hilburn

  Copyright 2013 Lynda Hilburn

  Digital Edition published by Lynda Hilburn, 2013

  Cover design by Kim Killiam at www.hotdamndesigns.com

  Digital formatting by A Thirsty Mind

  All rights reserved. No part of this book, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews, may be reproduced in any form by any means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without prior written permission from the author.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, business establishments, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  The scanning, uploading, and distributing of this book via the Internet or via any other means without the permission of the copyright owner is illegal and punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage electronic piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support of the author’s rights is appreciated.

  Table of Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Other Books by Lynda Hilburn

  Excerpt: Blood Therapy

  Excerpt: The Vampire Shrink

  About the Author

  Chapter 1

  “I’ve never had sex in a coffin before. Thanks for having such a fancy model delivered.” I slid my finger along the soft, warm lower lip of the unnaturally gorgeous, naked vampire lying on his side next to me, his perfect face propped against his palm in the spacious, satin-lined box. “It was oddly arousing. I wonder what my enjoyment of the experience says about my psychological health?”

  I lay back in the open casket, watching shadows created by the flickering candlelight dance against the rock walls and ceiling of his underground room. Ancient paintings, tapestries and Druid symbols covered the stone. Soft classical music wafted on the airwaves, and warmth radiated from crackling flames in a huge, ornate fireplace.

  Devereux chuckled. The deep sound resonated along my body like aural fingers. “Kismet, my love. Perhaps your arousal has more to do with the skill of your companion, rather than the location of the event?” He cupped one of my breasts, squeezed gently, then leaned forward and flicked his tongue across my nipple before he drew it into his mouth and sucked rhythmically, sending heat to my core. After a few seconds, the sharp tips of his fangs penetrated my skin. He growled low in his throat as he swallowed the blood flowing from the tiny wounds. I moaned and stroked his hair, which tumbled like liquid silk across my skin.

  Geez. He’s a full-body vibrator.

  “Thank you. I assume that is a good thing?” he asked in my mind.

  “Ha! You assume everything about you is a good thing. Eight hundred years of being the big, bloodsucking kahuna has inflated your ego. But we can talk about that later. For now, stop mind reading and concentrate on what you’re doing. The other nipple is going to develop an inferiority complex if you don’t give her some attention, too. You wouldn’t want her to think you’re playing favorites, would you?”

  He lifted his head, releasing the nipple mid-suck, which caused an erotic little wet noise. Then he licked the blood from his lips and laved the painfully erect nub once again before he met my gaze and grinned. “Certainly not. I love all your body parts equally.” He cocked a brow. “Big, bloodsucking kahuna? I understand the ‘big’ part,” he smiled wider and glanced down at the impressive erection wedged against my hip, “and bloodsucking goes without saying, but I am not familiar with the word kahuna. Please explain.” He shifted his mouth to my other breast, pressed his fangs into the skin, and suckled loudly. I gasped at the intense pleasure the man could generate with his magical oral skills.

  I threaded my hands through his platinum hair and whimpered. Waves of sensation pulsed along my skin. Goose bumps ran relay races up and down my arms. No doubt about it – vampire sex exploded the rating scale.

  I wet my lips and struggled to speak. “Ka… ka… hooooo… oh, yeah. That’s so good. I don’t know how you make me feel as if you’re licking every part of my body at the same time, but whatever you’re doing… don’t stop.”

  The sucking tempo slowed. “I would not think of stopping,” he answered in my head. “Unless, of course, you object to my using vampire wiles to entrance you, which is why you feel the sensations everywhere at once. I am aware that you do not totally trust me yet…”

  “I’m trying to.” He was right about the trust issue. I hadn’t found solid ground yet in this strange, preternatural world. Every time I thought I had something figured out, it changed. I was sure my blood pressure read several points higher since we met. “It isn’t only you, so don’t take it personally. It’s the whole alternate reality. You’ve had centuries to acclimate to the vampire view of things. I’m the new kid on the undead block.” He circled my areola with his tongue and I groaned from the pleasure of his oral gymnastics.

  “And you have made it clear you dislike being controlled…”

  “Yeah, well, in most situations I do, but just this once feel free to… holy shit!” A blast of heat spread from the epicenter of my nipple and morphed into the beginnings of an intense, whole-body orgasm, slamming through me like a carnal tidal wave, dragging me under a sea of ecstasy. I literally vibrated as my pleasure centers overflowed and my libido danced the cha cha.

  During the ecstatic onslaught, I’d apparently closed my eyes. When the body rush subsided, and I could breathe again, I forced my lids open and looked down, expecting to find a blond head attached to my breast. All I saw was bare skin and rigid, red nipples. I turned my gaze toward my coffin companion, who once again rested on his side, watching me, a dazzling smile on his godlike face. “It would appear that my vampire talents have met with your approval.”

  “Wow.” I swallowed and eased my tongue over dry lips. “Amazing. Approval’s an understatement. I’ve never felt anything like that before.”

  “I am glad I have impressed you.” He grinned, not bothering with false modesty.

  “You know you always impress me. Being able to move so fast you can touch my entire body simultaneously – that’s quite a skill.”

  “I did not move.” He shrugged. “In fact, I did not touch you at all after you gave permission for me to use mind control.”

  “You didn’t touch me?” I stared at him for a few seconds. “You mean the cosmic orgasm was only in my mind?”

  “No. It was real, physically, but it originated in my mind.” His lips curved. “Besides, you are the one who frequently insists that the human psyche cannot distinguish between something real and something imagined. You often bemoan the fact that mortals ignore the most powerful tool for healing and transformation available to them. I would say you proved your own point.”

  “Hmmm. Toe-curling orgasms as a path to enlightenment. What a great idea for a book. Of course, I’d have to leave out the vampire partner part, but I can see people lining up for my sold-out workshops. Who wouldn’t want to blend sex and higher consciousness?”

  He trailed his finger down my cleavage. “I hate to precipitate upon your erotic procession, so to speak, but I believe sexuality as a path to spiritual enlightenment has existed for a very long time.”

  “Precipitate upon my erotic procession? Wha . . ?” I laughed, realizing what he meant to say. “Oh, you mean rain on my sex parade.”

  “Yes.” He nodded and gave a slow blink of his blue-green, gemstone eyes, then rai
sed his chin. “Why are you laughing?” he asked in a frosty tone. “I see nothing amusing about my manner of speaking, yet you frequently mock me.”

  Uh-oh.

  “Devereux.” I angled onto my side and snuggled against him, meeting his suspicious gaze. I skimmed my lips across his. “I wasn’t mocking you. Sincerely. I think your unique language patterns are charming. Very old-world. However, it wouldn’t hurt you to spend more time with… individuals… who are from this century and this country.” He never let me forget he was an 800-year-old European, obsessively attached to his roots. “Isn’t it necessary for you to be familiar with contemporary slang in order to do business?”

  Another slow blink. “I have employees who handle those mundane details.”

  “Uh-huh. I think you’re just being stubborn. Refusing to give up one of your cherished eccentricities, er, idiosyncrasies, uh, I mean delightful characteristics.” I grinned. “Maybe even acting a little superior and snobbish.” He gave me a narrow-eyed glare. I laughed and stroked my hand along his jaw. “Don’t even waste one of those vampiric-master-of-the-universe eyeball locks on me. I know you too well to be intimidated by your mood shifts.”

  He arched a brow, insulted. “My mood shifts?”

  “As if you didn’t know. You have the ability to switch from being a perfect gentleman of Zen-like tranquility and reason into an enraged, fang-baring, undead avenger in a matter of seconds. Being a psychologist definitely comes in handy when dealing with a temperamental, unpredictable immortal who’s used to having his own way.”

  His shoulders relaxed before he leaned in, his breath caressing my face like a phantom finger. “You did not complain about me having my way with you, or the instability of my moods while you were writhing in bliss from my mental touch.” To prove his point, he sent another orgasmic wave vibrating through my body.

  “Oh, yeah,” I closed my eyes and mumbled, barely able to move my lips as invisible hands caressed my erogenous zones. For the next few seconds, I trekked into uncharted fantasy territory and shattered the world record for multiple orgasms. During the pleasure tremors, I grabbed a handful of his hair and held it in a death grip, pulling him close. “That was incredible. You are really onto something with this mental touching idea. Wait…” I released his hair, planted a palm on his chest, and pushed him back. Inspired, I sprang up into a sitting position, and adjusted my angle so I could look at him. “Hot damn. Does that mean you can have sex with me even if you’re not physically here?”

  “Of course.” His voice held a smile. “In fact, we have made love during the daytime in your dreams. Do you remember being on a beautiful mountain top shortly after we met? It was so real that you had a wound where I bit your inner thigh.”

  “Ah, yes. The labial feast. I definitely remember.” I eased my finger along his forehead, tucked some strands of silky hair behind his ear, and laughed. “That was when I still believed I’d suffered a psychotic break and all my vampire fantasies were neurochemical delusions from my splintered consciousness. Trust me. An unseen sex partner nibbling on my juicy bits isn’t something I’ll forget anytime soon. But does the sex have to be a dream? Do I have to be asleep? This mental sex has possibilities.”

  “What do you mean?” He sat up, frowning. “We are intimate as often as possible. Are you unsatisfied?” One perfect eyebrow arched.

  Well, well. The master’s ego isn’t secure in all areas. No matter how old or what species, a male is a male.

  I gazed into his eyes, noted the concern, and patted his cheek. “I am completely satisfied, as you well know from surfing through my thoughts constantly. But you’re gone a lot.” Not that I blamed him; between running an international mega-corporation and riding herd on vampires, he was a busy guy. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner we could have long-distance sex?”

  He shrugged and actively studied my face, looking for, I supposed, evidence of my hidden agenda. “It never occurred to me. I assumed you would prefer me in the flesh. Was I incorrect? ”

  I caressed his face again. Where’s this insecurity coming from?

  “It is not insecurity.” He answered my unvoiced question. “I simply wish to make you happy. As we have discussed, I desire you to become my mate. I will do whatever I can to ensure that outcome.”

  “As we have discussed? You mean, as you have informed me. I still don’t know anything about this mystical mate idea. You change the subject every time I ask questions about it. If you want me to trust you, start being more forthcoming. When are you going to explain?” And what’s the big deal?

  He leaned in and kissed me, lightly at first, then deeper as he slid his tongue into my mouth. “Soon. I promise,” he whispered, mentally.

  After a few seconds, he pulled away. “What is this kahuna? You never clarified.”

  “Very slick. You’re changing the subject, but I’ll play along. For now.” I stroked the contours of his chest. “Kahuna is Hawaiian. It refers to a shaman, medicine man or priest. I’m surprised you don’t know the word, since you’re all those things in your culture.”

  “Ah, yes. I see that my education has been limited in this area. I am familiar with the words for sorcerer or shaman in other languages – nagual and brujo. I will have to expand into the South Pacific for additional information. I have been so focused on Europe, that other locations have escaped my awareness. Thank you for enlightening me.”

  “I’m glad I could help you distract me from the topic at hand.”

  “Speaking of hands…” The corners of his mouth lifted and his eyes sparkled mischievously. “I can think of a much better distraction, if you like.”

  I laughed. “Part of me likes that idea, and I never thought I’d say this, but I’m temporarily orgasmed-out. My body can only take so much ecstasy before it wants to sleep. After all, unlike your supernatural self, I’m only human. So, while I’ve still got a little energy, why don’t we climb out of this coffin – and there’s yet another thing I never thought I’d hear myself say – and fly like bats upstairs to The Crypt.” I chuckled. “We’re supposed to meet your friends.”

  He gently lifted my chin. “Hmm. Interesting. This is not the first time you have mentioned bats. What is this fixation? I thought we had convinced you that vampires cannot really assume the shape of animals.”

  “It isn’t about bats, really.” I shrugged. “I just like the silly idea of it. There’s an old movie called Love at First Bite. It’s a comedy about a vampire who falls in love with a model he sees in a magazine. He tracks her down, romances her, and eventually wins her over. At the end, he bites her, and they both turn into bats and fly away, leaving her vampire-hunting ex-boyfriend behind. It’s just a cute movie. Besides, being able to think yourself across space and time isn’t any less bizarre than turning into a flying rodent.”

  He frowned. “I believe it is usually a squirrel that is referred to as a flying rodent, not a bat. A bat is a flying mammal.”

  “I stand corrected, Professor Devereux.” I flicked my hand in the same dismissive gesture he often used. “But my point, which you totally missed, remains. Sprouting wings or thinking yourself across the universe – it’s all the same. Definitely. Not. Normal.”

  “Traveling via thought is normal for vampires.”

  Normal. Vampires. Two words I never expected to hear in the same sentence. The notion of normal reminded me of its opposite, and I shivered at the memory of my bloodsucking stalker, Brother Luther’s evil twin, Lucifer. The fact that he could find me anywhere, anytime made my abdomen cramp. “Lots of disturbing things are normal for vampires.”

  My coffin companion must have read my mind or my body language, because he took pity on me and changed the topic. “I would like to see this movie about the model and her undead admirer.” He winked. “Maybe I can learn something about being a vampire from this film. I am always eager to expand my knowledge.”

  Sweet Devereux was trying to soothe me. His sensitivity was one of my favorite things about him. But now that L
ucifer had popped into my head, I found it hard to concentrate on anything else. The memory of my frightening time with the insane killer still caused me to have regular nightmares. I suffered from vampire-demon-induced PTSD and hadn’t yet made peace with the lunatic haunting my life.

  “Kismet,” Devereux said, startling me out of my stroll down Anxiety Lane. “Even if I were human and unable to scent your fear or hear your heart race, I could see how frightened you are.”

  My mouth went dry and my breathing shallow. I shifted my gaze to the mesmerizing flames sparking in the stone fireplace. “I’m okay. Really. We don’t have to talk about this right now.”

  We don’t have to discuss the fact that I’m still jumping at shadows. How can I trust anyone when my reality is a continuous nightmare?

  “Perhaps it would be good to discuss it. The mere mention of the Halloween events still sets you on edge,” he continued, face solemn. “It has been weeks, and I worry about you holding on to such terror and anxiety.” He gave a one-shoulder shrug. “What would you tell a client in your situation? Someone who had gone through a horrible trauma, and was attempting to repress the memories?” He turned my face toward his. “I intend for us to be together for a very long time. I hoped I had begun to earn your trust by now.”

  I took a deep breath and let it out as a loud sigh, deciding not to pick a fight with him about his familiar assumptions about our relationship. We’d only known each other a short time. I didn’t understand what the hurry was.

  “Trust is hard for me, Devereux. I don’t know if that’s due to my training or my childhood, but I’ve rarely been able to count on anyone besides myself.” I gave him a quick kiss. “But as I said, I want to trust you. I’m trying to. I believe you’ll do whatever it takes to protect me. Maybe I’m just not ready to put the recent experiences into words for anyone yet. I guess I’m being superstitious, but even recalling the last time I saw him makes me hyperventilate.” I started talking faster, the pitch of my voice rose. “I think I’m going to refer to… that vampire… as Spot from now on. Or Fluffy. Yes. A harmless pet name.” I wrapped my arms around myself. “I’m not trying to keep things from you. Really, I…”